GET INSPIRED WITH US ON PINTEREST

MEET

Hi there!  I’m Jasmine Roth, creator of this Blog, founder of Built Custom Homes, curator of my online retail store The Shop by Jasmine Roth and host of HGTV’s hit show Hidden Potential.  I was also on HGTV’s Rock the Block, but I won’t spoil the winner for you 😉  Building custom homes in Huntington Beach, CA is my bread and butter.  I love all aspects of the home building process and finding ways to make homes as personal, functional and beautiful as possible.  Join me as we explore my projects, DIY’s, behind-the-scenes peeks, and tips on how you can design beautiful, functional spaces in your own home. Let’s build something together!

GET SOCIAL

GET ON THE LIST

Your inbox deserves to have more fun

Thank you!

The Most Insecure I’ve Ever Felt As a Mom

42 comments

HGTV Jasmine Roth's baby Hazel in her helmet; the insecurities and mom guilt that come with it

Well, I think it’s safe to say that there isn’t a mom in the history of moms that thinks to herself, “I just really hope my precious little baby has to wear a hard plastic helmet on her head for 23 hours a day.” So yeah, you can imagine my chagrin when Hazel was 4 months old and the doctor explained to me why Hazel had to wear a helmet for the next 6-9 weeks. My first question (and one of MANY for the doc) was how this would affect Hazel and her development? Would she be able to sleep okay? Would she be able to do tummy time? Would she be annoyed by it?

Built Custom Homes Jasmine Roth with her baby Hazel wearing a helmet

The doctor quickly put those fears to rest by assuring me that the babies who wear helmets really don’t even notice them and aren’t delayed in any manner. Once Hazel was in the clear, my thoughts went a different direction. What would people think? I know, I know, in retrospect this is such a shallow way to look at things, but in the moment that’s honestly where my mind went. I was insecure. Would people judge us? Would they think we’d done something wrong as parents? Would they think I was a bad mom?

Built Custom Homes Jasmine Roth's baby Hazel wearing a helmet on wicker chair and crochet pillow

Honestly, now that we’re 4 weeks into her wearing a helmet, these petty fears feel pretty embarrassing. My heart goes out to parents who get much worse news about their children’s health – I can’t even imagine. And honestly, knowing other parents who have handled ACTUAL BAD NEWS with grace and dignity was what helped me squelch my insecurities, stop being selfish, and GET OVER IT.

Built Custom Homes Jasmine Roth with her baby Hazel wearing a helmet; insecurities as a mom

I think part of becoming a parent (at least for me) has been realizing that things aren’t going to go the way we plan them. I finished my pregnancy in quarantine and had a baby in the middle of a pandemic. Our family didn’t meet Hazel until she was 4 weeks old. My friends still haven’t held my baby and she’s almost 6 months old. I haven’t taken her anywhere, we had to postpone our nanny… the list goes on and on. But you know what? Everything has worked out and as parents, Brett and I have adapted, tried harder, and grown. Not a single thing on that list can outshine the bright light that is our little girl and even better, the silver linings that have come from a very trying 2020.

Brett and I are HOME with our baby. She’s safe and healthy, surrounded by those that love her. She spends every day with her grandma. Our friends will hold her when it’s safe and until then, they get to love her from a safe 6 feet away – look on the bright side, less germs! So anyway, what I’m getting at is, no matter what news you get about your children it will always take a minute to process. What I’m working on personally, is keeping perspective and trying to find the positive so I can be a strong mother – and not let pesky insecurities get the best of me.

Jasmine Roth with husband Brett and baby Hazel in her helmet; insecurities as a mom

And in true Jasmine-fashion, I put my final fears to bed by taking the situation and running with it. I reached out to my social media followers and that HELPED ME SO MUCH with lots of great advice and stories of babies who wore helmets without incident. Reading all those comments, I started to realize this was going to be okay. I booked a photo shoot for the next weekend, knowing I owed it to baby Hazel to document her journey… even if it included a hard plastic helmet! The day we got the helmet, I drove straight to the graphic design shop and they wrapped it in a custom plaid print I designed. And when it’s all said and done, I can’t imagine what I was so concerned about.

Hazel doesn’t mind her helmet at all. Everyone has been super understanding, kind, and supportive. I even feel like maybe by being so outspoken, it will help other parents feel less concerned about their kids in helmets. And you know what? I’m actually having trouble remembering why I was so nervous, which hopefully is a sign of personal growth. But let’s be honest, as a parent I’m sure there will be a million more instances where I will have to talk myself down, realizing I’m being petty, or worse even… selfish. Insecurities are tricky like that, you know? But hey… at least I’m trying. 🙂

HGTV's Jasmine Roth's Baby Hazel in her plaid helmet laying on a pink blanket

Parents/caretakers/guardians: can you relate? Any helpful things you tell yourself or do? I’d love to hear in the comments and learn!

42 Comments

  1. Lori Ray

    Dear Jasmine,
    I love your positive outlook on life. I enjoy watching your journey & your sweet family. It is obvious that Hazel is loved and top priority for you & your husband.
    I love Hidden Potential, Rock the Block & Help, I Wrecked my House. I love your originality and all the ways you customize for families. My favorite house was the Tiki House. And, that’s usually not my style! You’ve got me rethinking what my style is. I’m 61 and my styles have changed over the years from traditional to country, to eclectic to french country. Now, I’m leaning toward a combo of mid-century modern and farmhouse. Crazy huh?

    Reply
  2. Kathy

    You sound like an amazing mom to me!! I had 6 boys 5 biological and 1 adopted and my greatest fears have been for their safety and well being, they are the best thing I have ever did and my biggest blessing …As a mom you always want to protect what you hold most precious…
    Hazel will turn out amazing like her mom and dad ❤️ You are doing a good job!

    Reply
  3. Susan Krahn

    Love, love & love you more!!! Thank you for sharing, your honest & raw thoughts & feelings. You & Brett are doing a GREAT job. Love following you on Instagram & seeing pics & videos of Hazel .. who is the cutest & happiest baby.
    Live in the moment & enJOY!
    – Susan, solo mom of 3 : 17,15,10

    Reply
  4. Victoria

    Love this! You’re doing great mama! Thank you for sharing your journey

    Reply
  5. Nancy

    When my daughter was born, the pediatrician came into my room (after examining her for the first time) and said, “there is a problem…” As a first time mom, of course I panicked. The pediatrician said, “your daughter’s feet turn and we are going to send her to a specialist. She will probably have to wear casts for 3-4 months.” Long story short…my daughter did have to wear casts and I loved hearing her clank her legs together in the morning. She was letting me know she was ready to start her day. The casts were no big deal and she never noticed them.

    I do need to tell you…don’t sweat the small stuff. As a mother of a 17 year-old son, who was killed by a drunk driver, I have learned that helmets and casts just don’t matter (or whether the laundry and/or dishes are done). It’s all about the love and not to take things for granted.

    Reply
  6. JLynn

    I can relate to a young beautiful family. That’s all I see with you your husband and that gorgeous baby girl Hazel and at the end of the day that’s just perfection. Bless your little family💛

    Reply
  7. Patricia Varady

    My grandson was born with a flat spot on the back of his head. His birth mother said with me being present, she wanted a “perfect baby”. I said “he is perfect! It was obvious that she didn’t want him from the beginning. The doctors never recommended a helmet, but I’m sure they weren’t discovered yet. He is now 13 and the spot is barely noticeable. My son’s new wife has adopted her “perfect son “

    Reply
  8. Michelle

    Both of my sons wore helmets. They are now 17 and 11. I was nervous at first. I got a lot of questions with my oldest. When my younger son had to get one, we decorated it with the words “What are you lookin’ at?” on the front of the helmet. I LOVE seeing babies wearing helmets!! They are the absolute cutest!

    Reply
  9. Ann

    Just think, Jasmine-When all the other kids her age complain about wearing a riding helmet, she’ll be headed to the first jump on her fluffy pony! It’s a preriding skill!
    She is perfect! That smile says it all!

    Reply
  10. Marie

    Wow! Are you sure you are a builder? LOL! Your writing is incredibly inspirational. Newspaper or magazine worthy. Thx for authentically & courageously sharing your soul. I’ll bet your mom is marvelous. Have you ever had her on your shows? Who has inspired your character the most? I’d like to meet those beautiful people. Thx 😊

    Reply
  11. Kelly T.

    I started following you because of how much I loved Hidden Potential on HGTV, but I got to be honest, I love following you on Instagram and your blog even more these days! Like you, I had a baby girl (my second) during the pandemic and have struggled with nursing since day 1! I have laughed and cried with your posts, thank you for being so relatable and honest, Jasmine. It’s a breathe a fresh air. I wish your sweet family nothing but years of health and happiness!

    Reply
  12. Evie

    When my son was 18 months old I was told by a pediatric eye Dr. that my son had horrible eyesight, that he would never be able to read without glasses, and he had the eyesight of an 80 year old! Not quite the bedside manor or the news I wanted to hear. I was stunned and cried as I left the office. People in the elevator saw me crying as we left Vanderbilt. I remember the look on their faces. When I got in the car I realized the people in the elevator probably thought I just received horrible news about my baby. When I actually stopped and thought about it, there are some really sick children in the hospital and many parents getting devastating news about their child. On the car ride home I decided to count my blessings, and that if all we needed was a pair of glasses, then we were doing just fine!

    Reply
  13. Diane

    You’re doing a fantastic job as a Mom! This is such a crazy time right now. Enjoy the time you have with Hazel because it goes so quickly! Our daughter is turning 31 this month!

    Reply
  14. Steph P.

    I feel you on every word of this post! Our son needed a helmet, and I was beside myself. I was concerned about how he would feel wearing it, and what other people would think. I also felt that I had failed him somehow.

    I couldn’t believe how it didn’t even phase him, and how quickly I adjusted to him wearing it. I look back at pictures of him with his blue helmet and miss those days! His helmet just became part of who he was, and made his light shine even brighter.

    Reply
  15. Emily Goodwin

    Kids are so resilient. My oldest had his head looked at down at our children’s hospital but didn’t end up needing a helmet. Since then, however, he was diagnosed with autism (I was 5 months pregnant with our second at the time) and now he’s 4 our second is 2 this month and we have a 11 week old. Most of the time it just fits and we live our lives how we do but sometimes I can feel the stares. You’re doing great and continue to focus on the positive. Personally I find the helmets adorable on babies and take them as a sign that they have loving parents who care

    Reply
  16. Roberta Johnston

    Jasmine,
    Your pure honesty about your journey with your pregnancy, delivery, baby Hazel’s helmet etc will encourage and help so many other families who find themselves in similar situation and feel they are alone. But because of your genuine openness, they will feel they are not alone and that this is just a season they are living that soon will pass. Thankyou for just being you. ❤️

    Reply
  17. Hollie

    First – I don’t have any children so I can’t possibly imagine what that’s like. That being said, her little helmet is adorable, and as a person without children, I would hope my first thought of looking at a child with a helmet wouldn’t be “what did the parents do wrong” but more “what an adorable helmet”. It’s obvious to everyone that you’re both in love with her, so I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Keep doing what your doing, there’s no right or wrong.

    Reply
  18. Teri

    You are so strong by sharing your journey with us! You are loved and not judged. We all experience some sort of family issue. You handle what comes to you with such grace. I learn so much by your blogs. Thank you!!!

    Reply
  19. Valerie McManus

    Your fears and concerns are not unreasonable. As a mom you want everything in your baby’s world to be perfect. But Jasmine, the pure joy that shows in Hazel’s face says it all. She is a happy, super loved baby! You and Brett are fantastic parents. Thank you for sharing your journey and just keep doing what you’re doing.

    Reply
  20. Allison Bowen

    Hi Jasmine,
    I want to start off and say I love your show, but that’s not why we’re here. I have an insecure mom moment as well. My son was diagnosed with strabismus (cross eyed), when he was 3 yrs old. When he was 4 he had his 1st surgery, they go in cut the eye muscle to “re-align @ it. He had this done on both eyes. I of course was a nervous wreck, the thought of cutting on my boy and then knowing it was his eyes. Then 2 yrs later they had to do it all over again. This made me feel like I was a terrible mom, what could I have done differently to prevent this, etc. pre covid my son went in for his annual check up and as I knew his eyes weren’t completely fixed. You can see his left eye turn out when he’s tired. Unfortunately there’s nothing more they can do now, because they say his vision isn’t impaired it’s just aesthetic. He is 19 now and loves life and could care less that his eye is different. But what will happen in a couple yrs when kids start teasing him about it. I’m doing what I can to raise him to be kind and know he is beautiful no matter what. Hang in there mama, you’ve got this. Is mamas are here for you xoxo

    Reply
  21. Carrie

    Thank you for your honesty, and thank you for your perspective. My daughter (8) had to wear a helmet 23hrs a day as well for eight mos this year following a brain surgery that resulted in the removal of part of her skull. Covid delayed the surgery she needed to get a plate placed by mos., but we are finally on the other side. My gal is doing well now, but even at an older age she got used to her helmet and soon enough you all stop worrying about it. We would put eye stickers on it and move them around weekly as a joke. Hazel isn’t defined by a medical issue. She is defined by the love she receives and gives. Be kind to yourself, that self-compassion will shape Hazel more than any helmet ever could.

    Reply
  22. Chris V

    My Granddaughter was born with hip dysplasia and had to wear a harness that kept her knees up and out like a little frog. I was so thankful it didn’t bother her other than when she was hot and it would chafe a bit. Unfortunately we didn’t get to put her in some of the adorable outfits she had, but 4 years later she’s running, jumping and never had to have any surgeries! Beyond thankful.
    Please continue to share your families journey. I love seeing Hazel’s smiling face (helmet or not) She is a beauty😍

    Reply
  23. Susan

    What helmet? All I see is an adorable baby!

    Reply
  24. Pam

    My daughter wore glasses from age 4 to age 11 to correct her lazy left eye. I had worked as an optician so I should have been comfortable with that but when I saw her prescription I was very upset. Turns out she wore cute glasses (they ended up being her trademark!) and her vision corrected without surgery. I look back and wondered why I was upset.

    For what it’s worth, I’ve never seen a baby with a helmet and questioned the parents. You’re doing a great job!!

    Reply
  25. Sheli Jorgensen

    I remember when my “perfect” first son had to wear glasses at the age of 4 for a lazy eye that I hadn’t even noticed! It was hard at first until he got his cute little Harry Potter glasses. Now he’s 22 and I hardly remember what he looked like without glasses. We have been down much more difficult paths with our two other boys since then but being a first time mom it’s hard when things do go how you envision. Hazel is adorable and you are a GREAT Mom!!! Loved your Park City pictures!

    Reply
  26. Temple

    I work for a national company that also does helmets. It is more common than I even realized. You’re doing a great job! And if I’m completely honest I would have been insecure about it too..as I have been with things we have gone through with my daughter. But I have found that speaking up about it helps a ton because you realize you aren’t alone.

    Reply
  27. Laura

    I loved reading this blog. I don’t have kids myself but the way you and Brett addressed Hazel”s needs and shared with all of us is amazing. You got this Jasmine and anything else that may come your way. I totally enjoy watching your shows you have great style and ideas.

    Reply
  28. Diane Hampton

    Y’all are wonderful parents. We have never seen anything but a great big smile on Hazel’s face. The three of you are a beautiful Family . She is so Lucky to have you for a Mom. Thanks for sharing your life with us , you have made our lives so much better !!!

    Reply
  29. Fran

    Jas
    When we are pregnant we assume everything thing will be easy and our kids will be perfect. At the end of the day they are perfect, just not how the world describes perfect. When my daughter was in the 1st grade she was diagnosed with ADD. I was devastated and wondered what had I done wrong. Did I feed her too much, not enough, too much this not enough that. What I came to learn is that, she has ADD, but she is perfect. She is now 24, a teacher, dancer and has traveled the world sharing her passions with kids every where. Give yourself a punch list of credit. Hazel is beautiful and she is loved. Keep up the good work Hazel’s mom!💜

    Reply
  30. allie f.

    We got a 2nd opinion from a different pediatrician that our son didn’t need a helmet to fix his uneven ears and flat head. So we changed his sleep position for a few weeks (it included 2 10 pound bags of rice) and his ears turned out fine. he still has a kind of flat head but you can’t tell because of his hair.

    I don’t think you need to worry, just keep loving that sweet baby girl – she’s going to grow up knowing how much her parents love her – teach her the carpentry basics and she’ll be employable anywhere!

    Reply
  31. Pam Starck

    Jasmine, you are an incredible woman for SO many reasons. Sharing your feelings about beautiful Hazel’s helmet is such a brave BUT helpful gesture. I’m positive that many moms and dads feel this way, especially after hearing the news. My second son was born with a broken collarbone and thinking he had already been diagnosed with a physical problem just as he was born was shocking. We all want our children to be “perfect.” The reality is that everyone’s vision of “perfect” is different and that’s OK. You have been through SO much already in 2020 and have so much to be proud of despite the difficulties, setbacks, etc. Applause! Applause! Thank you again for opening the door to necessary and beneficial conversation. Hugs to you and your beautiful family. 🤗💓

    Reply
  32. Lindsay Switzer

    Thank you for sharing! She’s beautiful and so are you! She’s got the best mom she could ask for, us mamas can be hard on ourselves and it needs to stop – you sharing helps that!
    Such a fan!

    Reply
  33. Deborah

    Your mother did such an amazing job raising you, Jasmine. You are so grounded and strong. Hazel will definitely follow in your footsteps!

    Reply
  34. Rachel

    Thank you for sharing a bit about Hazel’s helmet. I had seen a few babies in them but had no idea why they were wearing them. Amazing the things that have changed since I had a baby 35 years ago!

    Reply
  35. Connie

    Your little Hazel is adorable! Two of my grandsons wore helmets. We have the cutest picture of the oldest one taken when he had his helmet off for cleaning. He was sitting on the sofa with both hands up on his head like something was missing! The best thing is the little ones have no memory of wearing it and the correction gets done.

    Reply
  36. Kris

    Every thought that went through your mind was totally normal. I think we need to give ourselves a bit of grace, to realize we’ll be knocked backwards at times but it’s more important to recognize how we pick ourselves up & move forward.
    When my son was born we were told he had a hole between his ventricles. My father had just passed 4 months earlier from heart issues & this news just totally shut me down. No surgery was needed but yearly tests, Dr visits & life choices became the new norm. It took 10 years for the hole to close naturally then another 10 years to monitor if scar tissue built up.
    But, the brighter side is that all is good! He is healthy & strong, has a greater appreciation/knowledge of nutrition & personal health and is currently a Division 1 college swimmer. You never know what can happen in life!

    Reply
  37. Brook

    Jasmine, if I have learned anything in my almost 18 years as a parent, it’s that expectations get tossed time and time again as you learn who this person is and what she needs. I swore my daughter would be just like me, and she’s absolutely not. I had to throw the parenting plan out the window several times. Now having what I’m calling a ‘COVID senior’, I had to readjust again to senior year expectations and plans.
    I am grateful that you are sharing your journey and being honest and vulnerable. We need more of that so we can learn and not be afraid to ask questions or for help.
    Your family, knowing there are good people out there, that brings me joy right now. Your girl is going to be awesome and secure knowing she’s surrounded by love.

    Reply
  38. Kitzelys

    Good morning, my name is Kitzelys Díaz. I live in Panama, I am writing to you because I have a 5-month-old baby who has been diagnosed with positional plagiocephaly. However, the characteristics of his head appear to be brachycephalic. In my country there is no place where I can perform a head scan in order to perform a skull orthosis. We managed to have a plaster cast taken to make the helmet. The same was done but due to the lack of precision, we had to suspend since the helmet was irritating his skin. I am sincerely looking for help. I want to help my baby with his head malformation. I saw your post about your baby’s plagiocephaly. I would like to know which clinic you went to to contact them and see how they can help my baby. Since this type of treatment does not exist in my country.

    Reply
  39. Deb Mauthe

    We all want to be perfect in terms of how we parent. 31 years into it and looking back would I change some things sure, but I did the very best I could at that particular time.
    Just know love, patience, being true to yourself will in turn make you a great parent.
    And then when she is 31 she will tell you how amazing you both have been and make you so proud!! You two are amazing and Hazel is blessed and I expect even now she knows it too. ❤️❤️

    Reply
  40. Susan H

    Jasmine, if its any comfort, my actual thought about her helmet was – with all these new gadgets out there for babies, I honestly thought there was a special reason this was helpful for your daughter. Stay strong and do what’s best for your sweet gift. She’s adorable and so is her Mom! You have lots of fans but you and your husband are presidents of her fan club. Keep celebrating her!

    Reply
  41. Lisette

    Love this post. I have a pre-teen and let me tell you, those parenting insecurities never fully leave, you just learn to give yourself, and your loved one’s, grace. I find that talking about the things that make you feel a bit slight, end up making up stand tall again.

    Oh, and when this pandemic lock down began, I was griping to my hubby and he said to look at it as a blessing, the next time we will be home together this much, we will be retired and our children will be grown…we will likely never again have this much time to get to really know our kids. Enjoy every moment without a nanny, good or rough!

    Reply
  42. Ana Walker

    Thanks for sharing your life experiences, you guys are doing a great job with your precious little girl ( which by the way looks exactly like your husband ) I love watching your videos and shows and all your special projects.

    Reply

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *